Some of the Funny Sayings.

A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted. Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.

Youth is a malady of which one becomes cured a little every day. He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed.

Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine.

Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.

An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'

You can't have everything....where would you put it?

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.

If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one.

Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.

An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

It a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.

You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.